Tuesday, March 21, 2006


In this world which resembles a mirror maze
You unentangle me and set the fire in me ablaze

You delight me
You mesmerize me

With you next to me
Everything seems so right
Life seems so nice
The pretentious world seems idealistic
And even lust seems so sanctimonious

But times change
And we walk different lanes
I feel a chasm in me that no one can replace
But the feeling refuses to fade

Distances this time so far but yet so near.

It’s these distances that bind me to you
It’s these distances that don’t let me wander
It’s these distances that speak in silence
It’s these distance the bring us closer

My eyes hallucinate your presence
My arms yearn for that warmth
My hands crave to hold your hands

I see you after an eternity
Seems like a desire since ages, now comes true
I revel in furtive exultation

But my eyes can’t look straight into your eyes
My hands tremble when you hold them
Everything that once seemed so right
Now suddenly seems not all that right
My life seems covered with a cloud of uncertainty
And perhaps I don’t see signs of any rain of surety
Some things have changed
Probably we have changed

Distances this time so near but yet so far

Thursday, March 16, 2006

I need you today

I need you today,
Tomorrow will be late,

When in this arduous journey,
My limbs are aching,
The desert wind is fierce,
And my eyes I cloudy.

Come now as an oasis or even as a mirage,
There are many at the ends of the rainbow,
But it is you who I want, should be there.

It is you, who holds without flowing,
It is you, who mesmerizes without alluring,
It is you, who hears without me speaking,
It is you, who ignites without touching,

If its really you,
I need you today.

Initial learning program(ILP) at TCS


My happiness knew no bounds when I got through TCS and Infosys. I had to make a tough choice. I opted for tcs, as there was a bleak opportunity of getting back to my hometown ‘mumbai’. I booked my tickets to Trivandrum for the fourth of September. The atmosphere at home on the third was serious. My family made it sound like I was going to fight a war on the Indian border. I never heard so many sermons even when I ventured into my teenage. Here I was all set to enter the big bad corporate world. Dad said, “Keep your eyes open and mouth shut. Think ten times before you speak”. And trust me it was one difficult task for someone as garrulous as me to actually keep my mouth shut. Sister said “ Don’t be manipulative but be smart enough so that others don’t manipulate you. BEWARE of sycophants.” With all the advices taken and with a bit of apprehension I embarked on my journey to the land of coconut trees (kerala). I wish the land was accompanied with a bit of culinary skills as well so that the food we ate could be a little delectable.

Here I was in Trivandrum with a bunch of equally apprehensive people eager to make their mark in the corporate world. Met people with a variety of skills. Some were technically savvy, some were smart, some had great command over language, some were genuinely naïve, some thought they were gods best gifts to humanity and to top it all there were some who would not stop asking foolish doubts. But trust me, they were the only redeeming feature in the boring technical lecture. They were someone whom anyone would love to imitate and the best sources of entertainment in the software engineering lecture. And here I introduce you to the word that every software engineer fears and that is ‘software engineering’. The lectures were slower than boring ekta kapoor soap and they seemed never ending like the eternal soap ‘saas bhi kabhi bahu thi’. And given a choice I would rather watch the boring ekta kapoor soap than listen to the lecture. Other lectures were sought of fun like istd, pge and sac. But what acted like the icing on the cake was foreign language. Everyone loved it except the few guys who took their own sweet time to pick up the foreign language. But hearing them speak was another great source of entertainment. And among the other things that provided entertainment was the scenic beauty of kerala. I never witnessed something so serene, so beautiful and so exotic. Generally trips tend to exhaust you but these trips rejuvenated us nonetheless. What actually exhausted us were the studies for the mid terms and the tests. After a beautiful trip to the beaches what awaited back at home was a bunch of print outs of the slides that were tough to comprehend without my notebook.

Days past by and so did the lectures and at the end of every lecture came the second most dreaded thing and this was the ‘feedback form’. Every engineer detested filling the form. Every one had blank faces and tried to grab snippets from the other and molded the sentence in their own sweet way and presented it. It was one tough job especially to remember how each faculty taught and what did it teach. It was simpler to remember salaam namaste’s imbecile story than remembering this crap.

Now life was getting hectic. We had to get up at six in the morning. All the girls were ready on time and this time it was the boys who took their own sweet time. And even after that, they did not manage to look one degree better. We spent the entire day at the office doing our project or attending boring lectures. I would go back to my hotel room and there I was throwing my clothes in the room and slipping into my night suit. This was one moment I really remembered mom. She always yelled at me when I threw clothes on the bed. And here I was with my roommate who gave me competition. If I threw four she would throw five. This was when I actually realized the importance of cleanliness. Now my drawer is absolutely clean with all clothes ironed and kept in place.

And finally the third most thing every engineer fears is the ‘MATC’. Everyone was keen on going back home and thankfully ‘MATC’ had been really kind with our batch. Almost everyone got his or her preferred location except a few. But one person that actually sent chills down our spine was ‘xxxx’. Everyone got so bored in her company. While having mundane conversation with her the facial expressions of most guys resembled as if they were suffering from constipation. The harder we tried to get rid of her, the more our efforts were in vain. Forget the guys even the girls who had considerable patience were now getting restless. Conversations with her were more boring and lengthy than a three-hour documentary film. We lost count of the boyfriends she had and we just prayed she never expatiated on her latest escapades. And here I felt like a true soldier fighting for the country as the moment the people who were getting bored with her got back to the hotel a warm welcome of flowers and paper balls awaited them.

Now came the time to depart. I thought I was entering a mean world but here I met the sweetest people of my life. Everyone was so much fun to be with. We developed a sort of harmony. We got accustomed to each other. Somewhere love blossomed and somewhere friendship .The bad corporate world seemed to be really sweet. Everyone was always ready to give a helping hand. If getting back home was something that made everyone happy losing on such wonderful friends made everyone sad. I wish this ilp lasted longer. This wonderful phase of my life is etched in my mind like one of the most beautiful memories. Thanks all of u, for this amazing memory.

Rang De Basanti

The battle between Bhagat Singh and Gandhiji’s tenets still continues. Ask anyone what gave India independence and the answer is definitely a culmination of both these approaches. Well, Rang De Basanti is more rebellious in its attitude and follows a more violent approach. Undoubtedly a well made movie with perfect music, excellent cinematography and outstanding acting. This movie is made to be a complete mass appeal.

Delving into the mindset of each of the characters you only realize that the director has a very condescending notion of today’s youth. On one hand there is Madhavan who is ready to sacrifice his life for the country while striking a contrast there is a bunch of five guys who want to live life like there is no tomorrow. The movie projects today’s youth to be impulsive, rebellious and hotheaded without an iota of patriotism. Patriotism is dormant in today’s youth and can be ignited only if the youth is asked to play patriotic characters in a movie. And nonetheless this feeling of patriotism is purely selfish in nature. The protagonists are ready to sacrifice their life because they can’t bear the loss of a dear one. Would they still sacrifice their life if they never knew the air force pilot who lost his life? The protagonists kill the defense minister and then regret it and to rectify this regret they go to the media. Bhagat Singh dropped a bomb in the high court with an intention of gaining the attention from people so as to arouse a feeling of patriotism and not because he intended to take someone’s life. Is today’s youth a slow learner? They follow the same process in a reverse way. First they commit a crime that stands out in sinister isolation and then try and seek media attention.

This movie leaves many mysteries entangled and many questions unanswered. It strikes the right chord that we need to fight injustice but unfortunately the procedure followed can never be justified. Watch this movie for a complete entertainment but if you are seeking a way to fight corruption, I guess you are asking for too much!!!!!!!!


What ‘s your elixir of life?
When you really want something to happen,
The whole universe conspires so that your wish comes true.

The above sentence that seems so apocryphal in today’s competitive age is the motif behind the book ‘The Alchemist’ written by ‘Paulo Coelho’. And when you read this book nothing seems truer than the fact that it is fate, which finally leads you to your destination. This novel skillfully amalgamates words of wisdom, philosophy, and simplicity of meaning and language, which makes it particularly readable.

The protagonist of the story is a Santiago, a simple boy who lives by traveling with his sheep. He is suddenly enchanted by a dream, he dreamt while resting under a tree, inside a ruined church in Spain. He dreamt that if he traveled to the pyramids, he would find his fortune. So he went on for an uncharted journey and along the way encountered magical phenomenon (meeting with the king and the alchemist). He also met the girl of his life, Fatima, on his way to Egypt. When he got to the pyramids, he met a desert soldier who told him that two years ago, he dreamt that in a tree that has grown inside the ruins of a church in Spain (the place from where Santiago embarked on his journey), he would find his treasure. In that instant, Santiago realized that what he's been looking for all these years is right where he left it. He found his treasure but realized that the actual treasure of his life was the journey itself. Along the journey, the protagonist stumbled upon many self-realizations and philosophies of life that would help him become the next Alchemist.

The book imparts various messages like ‘the means matter more than the end’,’ treasure lies where your heart belongs’,’simple things are the most valuable and only wise people appreciate them’ and ‘the only obstacle in life is the fear of failure’.The book illuminates on the power of dreams, destiny and most importantly optimism.

This book has transformed my pessimistic, materialistic and flamboyant attitude into an optimistic and idealistic one. The book taught me that the best way to overcome failure was its acceptance. It has taught me to overcome failures by facing them and not fearing them. It was then, that I realized that the biggest fear is fear of fear itself and the best gift is willpower. I believe life is a journey and the experience of life lies in the journey and not the destination. In a nutshell the book taught me to believe in myself and gave me my elixir of life. Read it to find out yours.

Wednesday, March 15, 2006


I wonder why life seems so tough,
Especially when there is a long way ahead to trudge.

So many expectations with each passing hour,
Doubt whether I will ever fulfill them with dignity and honour.

I look at others with an envious eye,
And then hate myself for comparing someone else with I.

Is it the case that life is greener on the other side,
Or the lady luck refuses to be by my side?

I imagine things the other way round,
And conjure up images of my life being so simple and sound.

I would then be so gullible, so naïve and weak,
Without modicum of courage to fight for myself and speak.

I thank god for giving me moments of depression and sadness,
Cause without them I would never understand the meaning of life and happiness.

We crib cause we consider difficulties as flaws that make life an imperfection,
But the fault lies in our perception,
Because in reality, difficulties make our life easier.